I am pregnant.
Two weeks ago I had some expected pre-menstrual cramping, normal but it felt different. I blamed my imagination as I have gone through too many cycles imagining pregnancy symptoms, just to end up with a broken heart. On day 28 I was prepared, but nothing happened. This is however not too strange, as I get the odd month where my cycle is 32 days, so I waited longer. I would double check each time I go to the loo, but still nothing. A tiny flicker of hope sparked but while browsing "early pregnancy signs" I got to an article which talks about weight gain (especially around the middle) which can mean PCOS, which results in missed periods. The flicker of hope died and I thought: great, now this as well. On Saturday (which was day 36) I could not handle it anymore. I drove to our adjacent town to go and buy a pregnancy test as our town is too small and only have a grocer which sells no such things.
I came home, unpacked the groceries and took my parcel to the bathroom. Riaan was in the kitchen busy making potato salad. I got into position and peed on the stick, two pink lines appearing almost immediately. I had a little hysterical fit (a happy one) and did a little boogie dance in the bathroom while trying to finish my pee, hold the stick, wipe my eyes, try not to make very strange noises and pull up my clothes - all at the same time. Riaan was saying something through the door about potatoes, I tried to answer but those very strange noises that I was trying not to make escaped from my mouth. He asked whether I am OK, so I opened the door. He took one look at my face, then at the stick I was holding up and realisation dawned in his eyes. It was priceless, I dreamed for 5 years about how this would play out and this was perfect. We grabbed each other and cried in each other's arms.
Five years. That is how long we tried to get pregnant. It feels really unreal still, but we are also very much aware of this awesome blessing which have been bestowed upon us. Maybe those other people were right, or maybe they just prayed and hoped and wished hard enough with us.
I can now look back and admit that this might just have been the perfect solution for us:
The solution to having a baby is to live a happy, healthy, very relaxed life, to have lots of fresh air and food, be surrounded by friends and people caring about you, no traffic and lots of open space... Sounds idyllic and like the perfect recipe for creating that bun in the oven...I will be seeing my doctor on Monday to confirm that everything is OK and discuss the road forward.
I want to thank everyone who supported, encouraged and shared our adoption journey. You carried me through the dark days and made the good ones better. I'm still deciding whats next, whether I will only do an update over here or start a pregnancy blog. Suggestions more than welcome...